As most of you know, I have been having issues with my dog, Pillow. She now manages to dig under the fence in the backyard and escape and we were written a ticket because of this and also since she wasn't up to date on her rabies shot. The animal control officer told me if I couldn't afford to get her shots and registration, that I could just bring her into PAWS and not have to pay anything. Yes, that's exactly what I wanted! I told Vince about it and he didn't want to. He says he likes having a dog. Coulda fooled me since she was caged up all day, everyday. A few days after that, she got out again and once again animal control showed up. I told her we had already previously been given a ticket. I told her how much I wanted to get rid of the dog, but my boyfriend didn't want to. So she told me about this program called the Spay and Neuter Program for low income families that will spay your dog, give them shots and registration for $50. I didn't really want to pay anything more for this dog, but Vince wanted to think it over. So the day the ticket was due arrived and Vince had yet to come to a decision. So I told him, you can hate me if you want, but I'm taking the dog to PAWS. Off I went and was about halfway there and Vince calls me and says he doesn't want to give her up and to sign up for the Spay and Neuter Program. He would pay for it. So I get her signed up and was told that I would take her into their vet on May 5. I wasn't thrilled, but I figured $50 wasn't so bad. Vince bought a trolley for Pillow so now she can run back and forth across the yard, but still be tied up. Unfortunately, she can still reach the fence and digs underneath, but is stuck just on the other side of the fence because of the tie out. I always have to pull her back in and then lock her up because I'm so pissed off at her!! Why doesn't she learn?!
Anyway, so I have been trying to get ahold of this officer who wrote me the ticket to tell him I got my dog signed up for the program and would the ticket now be voided. He never called me. What an ass!! So today I finally call the clinic and just talk to one of the front desk people, since tomorrow is the day I was supposed to go to court for the ticket and I really would rather not drag Logan out downtown if I don't have to. I tell them my situation and she puts me on hold for a bit and then comes back and tells me the ticket stands and I will have to pay the $100 fine. What the....?!?! I told her I signed my dog up for the program and she says, "It doesn't matter, she didn't get her shots before the ticket was due" I tell her I don't have that kind of money and she says that I will need to go to court tomorrow and ask for an extension. So, not only did I have to pay the $50 to get her shots, but now I have to pay $100 because I didn't get her signed up on time?! It would have been cheaper if I had taken her to my own vet and got it done sooner. I will have to drag Logan out tomorrow, but with no vehicle I don't really now how that is going to work. I don't understand why Vince wanted to keep that stupid dog!! We are having to pay so much for her and half of this family doesn't even want her. I'm about to call PAWS and just tell them to take her because I'm sick of this crap!! I am so pissed off right now, I dare somebody to cross me, they won't know what hit them!!
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Whistle While You Work
We are finally starting to work on the house again. Thank goodness. I keep telling Vince, Logan is going to be crawling around before we know it and I do not want him on the floor that isn't finished. Last weekend my mom watched Logan and we were able to get a lot done. We are also still moving stuff out of the other house's attic. All of that is going to be going into our little storage space at the new house. There really isn't enough room for it though so we are going to have to rent a storage unit. But right now, we don't have the money for it. Vince and I have decided we are just going to sell our old house. We were thinking about renting it out, but it needs a ton of work and am going to have to list it as a 'handy man's special' I'm probably just going to list it on Tradin' Post and some free sites and see if I get any bites. If that doesn't work, we are going to have to hire a realtor. We just need enough money to pay off the loan. A little extra would be nice, but I'm not going to push it.
Last weekend, Logan rolled onto his back from his tummy. He is such a strong little guy. He is going to be a handful when he gets older though, I can already tell. He certainly loves his daddy though. He always calms down when Vince holds him. It's really sweet. And I'm going to have to get him a little suit for when we get married, he's going to look quite the stud muffin :)
I'm very badly wanting to go back to work, but Vince doesn't want me to. I don't want people to think less of me for this, but Vince burns movies for people at his work and makes a decent amount doing it. He says that if I go back to work, he will no longer be able to do this because he'll be busy with Logan. And he makes the same amount in one day that I would probably make working a shift at Olive Garden, so it's almost pointless for me to work. So then I started thinking that I could do a day job, but then my entire check would probably go to childcare for Logan and that would be pointless too. So I'm really confused about what I should do at this point. Being a stay at home mom is what I always wanted to do, but now that I am, I miss working. I don't know if it's because I really want to be back on the work force or because we need money so badly and I feel like a need to contribute. Either way, we really do need the money and my being at home sure isn't getting us any.
We still haven't set a date yet for getting married. I called a couple of courthouses and Tazewell county costs $49 for a marriage license and $10 to get married. Woodford county costs $20 for a marriage license and I don't know how much to get married. I was supposed to talk to the judge, but he didn't answer the phone. They did tell me though that we would have to take an hour of marriage counseling at Woodford though and I don't know how much that costs. So far, Tazewell seems the better choice to me, but we'll just have to wait and see.
Last weekend, Logan rolled onto his back from his tummy. He is such a strong little guy. He is going to be a handful when he gets older though, I can already tell. He certainly loves his daddy though. He always calms down when Vince holds him. It's really sweet. And I'm going to have to get him a little suit for when we get married, he's going to look quite the stud muffin :)
I'm very badly wanting to go back to work, but Vince doesn't want me to. I don't want people to think less of me for this, but Vince burns movies for people at his work and makes a decent amount doing it. He says that if I go back to work, he will no longer be able to do this because he'll be busy with Logan. And he makes the same amount in one day that I would probably make working a shift at Olive Garden, so it's almost pointless for me to work. So then I started thinking that I could do a day job, but then my entire check would probably go to childcare for Logan and that would be pointless too. So I'm really confused about what I should do at this point. Being a stay at home mom is what I always wanted to do, but now that I am, I miss working. I don't know if it's because I really want to be back on the work force or because we need money so badly and I feel like a need to contribute. Either way, we really do need the money and my being at home sure isn't getting us any.
We still haven't set a date yet for getting married. I called a couple of courthouses and Tazewell county costs $49 for a marriage license and $10 to get married. Woodford county costs $20 for a marriage license and I don't know how much to get married. I was supposed to talk to the judge, but he didn't answer the phone. They did tell me though that we would have to take an hour of marriage counseling at Woodford though and I don't know how much that costs. So far, Tazewell seems the better choice to me, but we'll just have to wait and see.
Friday, March 27, 2009
Love and Marriage
Wow, I still can't believe that Logan is a month old already! Time really does fly. He is still working on trying to roll over from his stomach, but he's doing a pretty good job. He arches his back and almost makes it, but that's as far as he gets. I'm looking forward to the day when he starts smiling, then those 3am feedings won't be so hard cause I'll have something to look forward to.
A couple of days ago I got a letter from my brother apologizing for what he had done in the past. I was kinda surprised. He says he would like to start talking again and I would like that too. Even if he can be a real pill, he is still my brother and I love him. I haven't decided yet if I'm going to write back to him write away. I might just wait until I see him at Easter, but then that will be the first time he sees Logan and I don't want to put too much pressure on him in front of the family. I guess I'll just need to think about it a little more.
I've been doing some soul searching lately and realized that this is really not how I want to live my life. I never ever planned to live with a guy before I got married and I hoped and prayed I wouldn't get pregnant before I got married, but I let my guard down and it happened. Not that I would change it now, I love my son to pieces!! I've come to realize my life is the way it is because I choose to live this way. I believe that God blesses those that are faithful to Him. I haven't been faithful, I've been depending on myself and look where it's got me. I know there are people that don't believe in God and following His teachings, but that is how I grew up and truthfully almost everyone I know who is faithful to Him are very blessed people. I want to be one of those people. I used to be. Things were so easy for me when I lived for Jesus, and now...well things suck. I struggle everyday with how I am living. I know that suddenly because I start praying and going to church again that my life won't suddenly turn around, but I know I will feel better inside and that's really what's important. I just need to know that God will provide. I need to let of my selfish ways and lean on Him and that is going to be hard for me, so please be praying. But anyway as I was saying, I don't like living with a guy and having a kid and not being married so Vince and I are getting married this year. It's just going to be at the courthouse, which does devastate me because I would LOVE a wedding, but I don't have time for that now. We are planning on having a reception, something small for friends and family, but my family is pretty big so there will be a lot of people there...as long as everyone comes anyway :) We haven't set a date yet because I need to call the courthouses and see which county is the best one to go to i.e.cheapest and shortest waiting period. I think my mom is going to help me with a dress and the only thing we are going to need are rings. I'm a little concerned about that because last I knew rings are expensive. Something will turn up to help out though, I hope. Can't wait and I will keep you all updated on the plans!
A couple of days ago I got a letter from my brother apologizing for what he had done in the past. I was kinda surprised. He says he would like to start talking again and I would like that too. Even if he can be a real pill, he is still my brother and I love him. I haven't decided yet if I'm going to write back to him write away. I might just wait until I see him at Easter, but then that will be the first time he sees Logan and I don't want to put too much pressure on him in front of the family. I guess I'll just need to think about it a little more.
I've been doing some soul searching lately and realized that this is really not how I want to live my life. I never ever planned to live with a guy before I got married and I hoped and prayed I wouldn't get pregnant before I got married, but I let my guard down and it happened. Not that I would change it now, I love my son to pieces!! I've come to realize my life is the way it is because I choose to live this way. I believe that God blesses those that are faithful to Him. I haven't been faithful, I've been depending on myself and look where it's got me. I know there are people that don't believe in God and following His teachings, but that is how I grew up and truthfully almost everyone I know who is faithful to Him are very blessed people. I want to be one of those people. I used to be. Things were so easy for me when I lived for Jesus, and now...well things suck. I struggle everyday with how I am living. I know that suddenly because I start praying and going to church again that my life won't suddenly turn around, but I know I will feel better inside and that's really what's important. I just need to know that God will provide. I need to let of my selfish ways and lean on Him and that is going to be hard for me, so please be praying. But anyway as I was saying, I don't like living with a guy and having a kid and not being married so Vince and I are getting married this year. It's just going to be at the courthouse, which does devastate me because I would LOVE a wedding, but I don't have time for that now. We are planning on having a reception, something small for friends and family, but my family is pretty big so there will be a lot of people there...as long as everyone comes anyway :) We haven't set a date yet because I need to call the courthouses and see which county is the best one to go to i.e.cheapest and shortest waiting period. I think my mom is going to help me with a dress and the only thing we are going to need are rings. I'm a little concerned about that because last I knew rings are expensive. Something will turn up to help out though, I hope. Can't wait and I will keep you all updated on the plans!
Friday, March 20, 2009
Working Mom
Money has been extremely tight for us right now. Vince just isn't bringing home enough money to pay all the bills. We were doing ok until the child support started and then it got bad. After that the CILCO bill skyrocketed up and now I am on a payment plan, but it requires us to pay $250 a month for a year and that's a lot for us. That's bigger than a week's check for Vince. So I am planning on going back to work. First, I'm going to try Olive Garden and see if they will let me back. I know that people aren't going out to eat as much so I'm a little worried about being able to get my job back. I didn't exactly quit for maternity leave, I quit in July and was only a month pregnant at the time, but the smell of the food made me sick. I just hope the managers are understanding enough to let me back. *fingers crossed* I would like to just work part time because I don't want to leave Logan while he is still so young. I'm going to have to work nights though so Vince can watch him after he gets off work. My worry is, I will have a work a Sunday shift, that's just a mandatory thing they do if you aren't working Mon-Fri and Vince says he doesn't want to watch Logan on Sunday night because he has to get up early on Monday for work. Well boohoo!!! I get up with him every frickin' morning to make him breakfast and it's not like I get to go back to sleep once Vince leaves for work. Logan gets up about the same time that Vince leaves so I take care of him for a few hours until he falls asleep and then I start trying to clean the house. So it's not like I'm just sitting around on my butt all day at home doing nothing!! Vince is so stubborn and Logan is just like him already, I can tell. He fights me when I try and burp him and he screams bloody murder when I change his diaper. There is no way I am going to hire a babysitter to watch Logan on Sunday night because I don't know anybody. Plus I'm not going to trust just anybody with my baby. Vince seriously needs to grow up!!! But if it comes down to it, I may need to find someone to watch him on Sunday nights. So if any of my readers would like to baby sit on Sundays I would be really grateful :)
Logan is doing good, he eats like a pig. I nurse him and he is still always hungry after he's finished with me so I'm always making him a bottle. I hope my breastpump comes soon. I'm getting tired of waiting for this thing. Yesterday I went to the grocery store and took Logan with me. He was such a good little boy in the store, all quiet, just watching the lights on the ceiling as I walked around. Once we got into the car and on our way home, he started screaming. A couple days ago and had kicked his little legs so hard, he cut his heal on the car seat and I was worried about him being fussy in the car because I didn't want him hurting himself. I had socks on him, so I thought he would be ok. Well on the way home, he wouldn't stop screaming and when I finally get back to our house the street is lined with cars and our stupid neighbor is parked right in front of my house even though he has a driveway he can park in. Stupid idiot!! So I have to park a ways away and carry my screaming baby into the house. I wanted to tell the neighbor off, but I just gave his wife a dirty look(she was still sitting in the car). I get in the house and yell for Vince to watch Logan so I can go get the groceries. I come back in and Vince is cuddling Logan and says "He cut his heal open" I look at the car seat and there is blood all over the spot that his little foot was. I started bawling!! My poor baby!! I washed him up and put some Neosporin and a band-aid on him and then called my mom and cried to her. He just has such a strong kick. Logan is starting to get fussy so that's all for now.
Logan is doing good, he eats like a pig. I nurse him and he is still always hungry after he's finished with me so I'm always making him a bottle. I hope my breastpump comes soon. I'm getting tired of waiting for this thing. Yesterday I went to the grocery store and took Logan with me. He was such a good little boy in the store, all quiet, just watching the lights on the ceiling as I walked around. Once we got into the car and on our way home, he started screaming. A couple days ago and had kicked his little legs so hard, he cut his heal on the car seat and I was worried about him being fussy in the car because I didn't want him hurting himself. I had socks on him, so I thought he would be ok. Well on the way home, he wouldn't stop screaming and when I finally get back to our house the street is lined with cars and our stupid neighbor is parked right in front of my house even though he has a driveway he can park in. Stupid idiot!! So I have to park a ways away and carry my screaming baby into the house. I wanted to tell the neighbor off, but I just gave his wife a dirty look(she was still sitting in the car). I get in the house and yell for Vince to watch Logan so I can go get the groceries. I come back in and Vince is cuddling Logan and says "He cut his heal open" I look at the car seat and there is blood all over the spot that his little foot was. I started bawling!! My poor baby!! I washed him up and put some Neosporin and a band-aid on him and then called my mom and cried to her. He just has such a strong kick. Logan is starting to get fussy so that's all for now.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Dogonit!!
My dog, Pillow, is driving me crazy!! We put the dogs outside after Vince fixed the fence in the backyard and T-Bone escaped again before I even came home from the hospital. I've already decided that if PAWS calls and tells me they have him, I'm going to tell them to keep him. I'm not paying another $100 to get him out. Anyway, this isn't about T-Bone, it's about Pillow. She cried so much the first couple of days she was outside after T-Bone ran away, but there was no way I was letting her back into the house, not with the baby. She has torn the screen off the screen door and sticks her head through it, trying to get inside I guess. The crying and the torn screen really got on my nerves, but that wasn't the last of it. A few days ago when it was really windy, one of our garbage cans was knocked over by the wind and Pillow got into it. There was garbage all over the back yard and we live next to an alley where people cut through a lot. It is SO embarrassing to have garbage just sitting in your yard. I didn't want to wait for Vince to get around to picking it up because who knows how long that would take, so I just did it myself. I did smack her butt a few times when she came over to me, I was just so mad. Now on Wednesday, she got into the garbage again and this time I know she knocked them over herself, but now it's both garbage cans so it's double the garbage. Plus the fact that Thursday is garbage day and all our garbage was laying around in the yard. I don't have the desire to pick it up this time, but that was the last straw. I was planning on calling TAPS and asking if they could take her, but then I looked on their website and it says they ask for a donation if you surrender your animal to them and I really have no extra money to do that so she won't be going to TAPS. I ended up just putting her on freecycle and someone did write me saying they wanted her. Now I'm just waiting to see if he will respond back to the email I just sent him. I'm hoping he still wants her!!
But yesterday, I get a letter in the mail from PAWS here in Peoria about T-Bone. It said that since I have reclaimed T-Bone twice from them, yes he has escaped from us more than once, I will have to have him neutered. Good luck with that, since he is gone again. Then it says, if I don't do this by April 10, I will get a misdemeanor charge. Are you kidding me ?!?! I would get a misdemeanor put on my record for not neutering my dog?! This is yet another reason why I hate this stupid city, ugh I just want to get out of here!!!! So anyway, I'm planning on calling them and telling them, T-bone once again ran away. I have a feeling that they would come by the house to see if I was telling the truth and Pillow doesn't have up to date tags. They would make me get her rabies shots and new tags and the money just isn't there. That's another reason I'm trying to get rid of her. I don't want to spend anymore money on dogs. Once we can get rid of Pillow, I don't plan on getting another dog for a number of years, maybe never. I'm just getting sick and tired of all that comes with being a dog owner in the city of Peoria. If you've read my other blogs, you'll know what I'm talking about.
Logan is doing great! I'm still supplementing him with formula because he just isn't getting enough from me. I went to WIC two days ago and asked about a breast pump and they told me my OB had to write a prescription for one and send it to some place near Chicago. I really need a pump because I want to get Logan off the formula, so I just need to find the time to go to my OB and get this taken care of. After two weeks, Logan is now back to his birth weight, yeah!! And he is peeing after almost every feeding now too. I'm so happy that things are going better with him. When I put him to my shoulder to burp him, he can actually hold his head up now for an extended period of time and when I put him on his tummy, he can almost roll onto his side, and he's only two weeks old!! I don't want him growing up too fast. Vince says he gets the strength from him and that's why he is so strong. LOL, I think that's funny, but it's probably true. I'm a weakling. I think that's all I have for now.
But yesterday, I get a letter in the mail from PAWS here in Peoria about T-Bone. It said that since I have reclaimed T-Bone twice from them, yes he has escaped from us more than once, I will have to have him neutered. Good luck with that, since he is gone again. Then it says, if I don't do this by April 10, I will get a misdemeanor charge. Are you kidding me ?!?! I would get a misdemeanor put on my record for not neutering my dog?! This is yet another reason why I hate this stupid city, ugh I just want to get out of here!!!! So anyway, I'm planning on calling them and telling them, T-bone once again ran away. I have a feeling that they would come by the house to see if I was telling the truth and Pillow doesn't have up to date tags. They would make me get her rabies shots and new tags and the money just isn't there. That's another reason I'm trying to get rid of her. I don't want to spend anymore money on dogs. Once we can get rid of Pillow, I don't plan on getting another dog for a number of years, maybe never. I'm just getting sick and tired of all that comes with being a dog owner in the city of Peoria. If you've read my other blogs, you'll know what I'm talking about.
Logan is doing great! I'm still supplementing him with formula because he just isn't getting enough from me. I went to WIC two days ago and asked about a breast pump and they told me my OB had to write a prescription for one and send it to some place near Chicago. I really need a pump because I want to get Logan off the formula, so I just need to find the time to go to my OB and get this taken care of. After two weeks, Logan is now back to his birth weight, yeah!! And he is peeing after almost every feeding now too. I'm so happy that things are going better with him. When I put him to my shoulder to burp him, he can actually hold his head up now for an extended period of time and when I put him on his tummy, he can almost roll onto his side, and he's only two weeks old!! I don't want him growing up too fast. Vince says he gets the strength from him and that's why he is so strong. LOL, I think that's funny, but it's probably true. I'm a weakling. I think that's all I have for now.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
A Baby Story
Wow, things have been crazy!! As most of you know, I was due on Feb. 19 and have just been waiting around for the little guy to make his appearance. On Monday, I had an appointment with my OB and was planning on talking with her about getting induced since she was going to be leaving for vacation on Thursday and I really wanted to have her deliver Logan. I was worried about using pitosin though because my mom told when they induced her and used pitosin, it was very hard on her body and it might have the same effect on me. So I go in on Monday and nothing has really changed so she asks what I want to do and I tell her I would like to get him out because I wanted her to deliver him. She also said that he was facing the wrong way and that might cause some problems as well. I mentioned my concern about pitosin and she told me they would give me a pill orally to try and start contractions and if it wasn't working good enough then they would start pitosin. So she called the hospital and told me I could head over to Methodist right away. I called Vince up and told him I had to come and pick him up from work, since I had driven him to work so I could use to car to go to the OB. We grabbed some lunch and my bags and headed to Methodist and got there around noon. I was getting super scared though because I just didn't really know what to expect.
They started me out on my medicine and was told I would be given 4 doses every 4 hours. So it was pretty much a waiting game from then on. Around 10 that night the contractions finally started. I couldn't sleep at all that night cause the pain just kept getting worse, but I really wanted to do this without an epidural. They started the pitosin at 7am the next morning and then my midwife came in and broke my water. I couldn't deal with the pain and they said they could give me something called neomorphin (sp?), so I opted for that. I was worried that it might affect the baby, but they were saying such a small amount goes in that he would be fine. Since the baby was facing the wrong way I was having back labor and people say this is the worst kind, I believe them. It was very painful!! The drug they gave me helped me to sleep as well and while I was sleeping a group of nurses came in and told me I needed me to lay on my back because the baby's heart rate had dropped, I looked at the monitor and it was really low. When laying on my back didn't work they told me to lay on my other side and gave me oxygen. His heart rate started to go up a little so the nurses left again. About a half hour later they came back and told me his heart rate had dropped again and made me get on my elbows and knees along with the oxygen. I was getting so scared by now. What was happening to my baby? I was able to lay on my side soon after and the Dr. came in and told me if things didn't start progressing they would have to do a c-section. They turned off the pitosin drip and I was in so much pain by now I told them I wanted the epidural. So much relief after that, no more pain!! The baby's heart rate went back up and I was doing contractions on my own without the drugs. Come to find out it was the pitosin that caused the baby's heart rate to drop. I knew I had a reason to worry about that stuff!!
Things were progressing really well, but I was stuck on 9 cm and they wouldn't let me push until I was fully dilated. My epidural was starting to wear off and I made Vince go get a nurse. I said I needed more epidural because it was hurting so bad!! They came and gave me another dose and all was well again. I was stuck on 9 cm for a few hours and then a nurse came in and had me push and just moved the rest of the cervix out of the way, just like that!! Ugh! I started pushing at 7:15pm and didn't get the baby out until 10:13 pm. So in all I was in labor for 24 hours and pushed for 3 hours. I don't plan on having anymore kids anytime soon, lol!! Logan Frederick Beeney weighed 7 lbs 12 oz and 19 1/2 inches long. Just right. My midwife told me she was so proud of me because she didn't think I would make it this far, she figured I would have to have a c-section. I am so happy it's all over and now I have my little baby.
Vince said when they took Logan to the nursery for the first time he pooped right away all over his blankets, lol!! He has some skin tags on his ear and they said that could indicate kidney problems. They did a sonogram on him and everything came up normal. They were keeping an eye on him though because he wasn't urinating like they wanted him to. He only peed once the whole time we were at the hospital and that was from them having to sprinkle warm water on him to make him go. The first night we were home he peed once during the night and that was it. So in all only two times in the three days he had been alive :( They kept telling me that breastfeeding is the way to go and I was planning on doing that the whole time. He latched really easily, but my milk still hadn't come in so that may have been a reason for him not peeing. The nurses told me I didn't have to supplement him with formula because what he was getting from me was good enough. The pediatrician however said I should give him some formula and I guess he told the nurses this to, but they never told me and so never gave me any formula to take home. A couple of premixed batches, but not enough to really supplement him. So I just kept breastfeeding and he was crying all the time, the entire first night. I did end up giving him some of the premixed stuff the nurses gave me because I really needed to sleep but I felt so guilty for doing it. I had an appointment set up for Logan on Friday to see the pedi. and asked my mom to come with. They weighed him and he had lost almost a pound! My poor little guy, the pedi got after me for not giving him formula, but from what the nurses told me, I thought I was doing exactly what I should be. I almost cried right in front of him, I felt so bad and humiliated. I felt like I starved my poor little man. The pedi gave me some formula to take home and told me to feed him every 2-3 hours. I have to go back on Monday to make sure he is gaining weight. I'm just so worried now that I'm giving him formula that my milk will never come in. I try breastfeeding him first and if he's still fussy I give him formula, but it just doesn't feel like I will ever get my milk. I'm really upset about it, but at least Logan isn't starving now. He didn't pee at all last night and he hadn't peed in over 24 hours. The pedi called to check up on me today and I told him Logan still hadn't peed and he told me if he still hadn't by this evening I need to take him to the ER, there could be something wrong with his kidneys. When I gave Logan his bath, soon after hanging up with the pedi, he did finally pee!! I hope he keeps it up. I'm just so worried about the little guy, I hope I'm doing everything right. He is sleeping better though so I will take that as a good sign :)
Anywho, a few other things have been going on as well. While I was at the hospital Vince hooked up the new kitchen faucet and now I have working sink, yeah!! He and has dad had been working on the plumbing all week and the faucet was the finishing touch. Vince also worked on the fence outside and made it very secure. He kicked the dogs out so when I came home, I wouldn't have to worry about them anymore. Well, T-Bone dug a hole underneath the fence and escaped while we were at the hospital and he is long gone. I really don't care anymore, that dog had way too much energy and if he is going to go running off all the time then I don't want to deal with him. Who knows where he is now, but I'm not paying another $100 to get him out of PAWS if they catch him. We've already wasted enough money on these stupid dogs! And my priorities have changed a little as well, my baby is WAY more important than any animal. Pillow is still outside and she's staying out there even though she is constantly crying and has already ripped the screen on the screen door to shreds. I am really starting to wonder why I ever wanted a dog. Also, Vince and I were looking forward to our tax refunds because I was going to pay all the bills for the following month with my return and we were going to save all of Vince's return to pay for Logan's needs. There was something in the mail yesterday that said the government is taking all of Vince's tax returns to pay for his debt owed on child support!! All of that money is gone now. This is not what I needed right after having a baby. He won't be caught up next year with his child support either, since he has to back pay for a full year so that means I will have to work and claim Logan so his stupid, selfish ex won't get next year's tax returns too!!! So now I'm really torn on what to do. My tax returns won't be enough to pay the bills and for Logan and unfortunately, if we don't pay the bills then we won't have electricity and we need that for obvious reasons. Money wasn't supposed to be a worry right now with Logan. I have enough to worry about with him, I don't need this extra stress.
They started me out on my medicine and was told I would be given 4 doses every 4 hours. So it was pretty much a waiting game from then on. Around 10 that night the contractions finally started. I couldn't sleep at all that night cause the pain just kept getting worse, but I really wanted to do this without an epidural. They started the pitosin at 7am the next morning and then my midwife came in and broke my water. I couldn't deal with the pain and they said they could give me something called neomorphin (sp?), so I opted for that. I was worried that it might affect the baby, but they were saying such a small amount goes in that he would be fine. Since the baby was facing the wrong way I was having back labor and people say this is the worst kind, I believe them. It was very painful!! The drug they gave me helped me to sleep as well and while I was sleeping a group of nurses came in and told me I needed me to lay on my back because the baby's heart rate had dropped, I looked at the monitor and it was really low. When laying on my back didn't work they told me to lay on my other side and gave me oxygen. His heart rate started to go up a little so the nurses left again. About a half hour later they came back and told me his heart rate had dropped again and made me get on my elbows and knees along with the oxygen. I was getting so scared by now. What was happening to my baby? I was able to lay on my side soon after and the Dr. came in and told me if things didn't start progressing they would have to do a c-section. They turned off the pitosin drip and I was in so much pain by now I told them I wanted the epidural. So much relief after that, no more pain!! The baby's heart rate went back up and I was doing contractions on my own without the drugs. Come to find out it was the pitosin that caused the baby's heart rate to drop. I knew I had a reason to worry about that stuff!!
Things were progressing really well, but I was stuck on 9 cm and they wouldn't let me push until I was fully dilated. My epidural was starting to wear off and I made Vince go get a nurse. I said I needed more epidural because it was hurting so bad!! They came and gave me another dose and all was well again. I was stuck on 9 cm for a few hours and then a nurse came in and had me push and just moved the rest of the cervix out of the way, just like that!! Ugh! I started pushing at 7:15pm and didn't get the baby out until 10:13 pm. So in all I was in labor for 24 hours and pushed for 3 hours. I don't plan on having anymore kids anytime soon, lol!! Logan Frederick Beeney weighed 7 lbs 12 oz and 19 1/2 inches long. Just right. My midwife told me she was so proud of me because she didn't think I would make it this far, she figured I would have to have a c-section. I am so happy it's all over and now I have my little baby.
Vince said when they took Logan to the nursery for the first time he pooped right away all over his blankets, lol!! He has some skin tags on his ear and they said that could indicate kidney problems. They did a sonogram on him and everything came up normal. They were keeping an eye on him though because he wasn't urinating like they wanted him to. He only peed once the whole time we were at the hospital and that was from them having to sprinkle warm water on him to make him go. The first night we were home he peed once during the night and that was it. So in all only two times in the three days he had been alive :( They kept telling me that breastfeeding is the way to go and I was planning on doing that the whole time. He latched really easily, but my milk still hadn't come in so that may have been a reason for him not peeing. The nurses told me I didn't have to supplement him with formula because what he was getting from me was good enough. The pediatrician however said I should give him some formula and I guess he told the nurses this to, but they never told me and so never gave me any formula to take home. A couple of premixed batches, but not enough to really supplement him. So I just kept breastfeeding and he was crying all the time, the entire first night. I did end up giving him some of the premixed stuff the nurses gave me because I really needed to sleep but I felt so guilty for doing it. I had an appointment set up for Logan on Friday to see the pedi. and asked my mom to come with. They weighed him and he had lost almost a pound! My poor little guy, the pedi got after me for not giving him formula, but from what the nurses told me, I thought I was doing exactly what I should be. I almost cried right in front of him, I felt so bad and humiliated. I felt like I starved my poor little man. The pedi gave me some formula to take home and told me to feed him every 2-3 hours. I have to go back on Monday to make sure he is gaining weight. I'm just so worried now that I'm giving him formula that my milk will never come in. I try breastfeeding him first and if he's still fussy I give him formula, but it just doesn't feel like I will ever get my milk. I'm really upset about it, but at least Logan isn't starving now. He didn't pee at all last night and he hadn't peed in over 24 hours. The pedi called to check up on me today and I told him Logan still hadn't peed and he told me if he still hadn't by this evening I need to take him to the ER, there could be something wrong with his kidneys. When I gave Logan his bath, soon after hanging up with the pedi, he did finally pee!! I hope he keeps it up. I'm just so worried about the little guy, I hope I'm doing everything right. He is sleeping better though so I will take that as a good sign :)
Anywho, a few other things have been going on as well. While I was at the hospital Vince hooked up the new kitchen faucet and now I have working sink, yeah!! He and has dad had been working on the plumbing all week and the faucet was the finishing touch. Vince also worked on the fence outside and made it very secure. He kicked the dogs out so when I came home, I wouldn't have to worry about them anymore. Well, T-Bone dug a hole underneath the fence and escaped while we were at the hospital and he is long gone. I really don't care anymore, that dog had way too much energy and if he is going to go running off all the time then I don't want to deal with him. Who knows where he is now, but I'm not paying another $100 to get him out of PAWS if they catch him. We've already wasted enough money on these stupid dogs! And my priorities have changed a little as well, my baby is WAY more important than any animal. Pillow is still outside and she's staying out there even though she is constantly crying and has already ripped the screen on the screen door to shreds. I am really starting to wonder why I ever wanted a dog. Also, Vince and I were looking forward to our tax refunds because I was going to pay all the bills for the following month with my return and we were going to save all of Vince's return to pay for Logan's needs. There was something in the mail yesterday that said the government is taking all of Vince's tax returns to pay for his debt owed on child support!! All of that money is gone now. This is not what I needed right after having a baby. He won't be caught up next year with his child support either, since he has to back pay for a full year so that means I will have to work and claim Logan so his stupid, selfish ex won't get next year's tax returns too!!! So now I'm really torn on what to do. My tax returns won't be enough to pay the bills and for Logan and unfortunately, if we don't pay the bills then we won't have electricity and we need that for obvious reasons. Money wasn't supposed to be a worry right now with Logan. I have enough to worry about with him, I don't need this extra stress.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Anytime Now
Well, today is my due date and so far....nothing. Every morning for about the past week I've had cramping, but then it goes away. A couple of nights ago I had a couple contractions(I think, I'm not really sure what they feel like) but then when I started walking around they stopped. Ugh, I just want this kid out of me!! I think the worst part is sleeping and then rolling over to my other side. So uncomfortable!!! For those of you who have yet to experience pregnancy, it's great until the 3rd trimester and then it's almost impossible to get comfortable without contorting your body into positions I didn't even think possible. Plus, I get up at 5:30 every morning with Vince to make him breakfast and see him off to work. I already told him that once the baby comes, he will probably have to fend for himself in the mornings. He doesn't seem to understand why though. Are guys really that stupid!?
My kitchen sink still isn't up and running and since I have no bathtub, just a shower, I really need this to get done!! I have to have some way to give Logan a bath. I'm also begging Vince to make sure the fence in the back yard is solid from top to bottom because the dogs are going outside permanently once that is done. OMgosh they stink SO bad and it's not just me, my mom came over and said it really stinks like dog, yuck!! Pillow enjoys dragging herself along the rug in the living room and spreading her hair and mucus all over the rug and every morning when I come downstairs it smells worse than it did the day before. I stay up in the bedroom almost constantly because of this. Dumb dog!! I'm sure that family and friends will want to come and see the baby at our house and I don't want my home to reek. I need these dogs out so I can actually clean the rug so it no longer stinks. Oh yeah, and T-Bone has already managed to some how wiggle his way out of the back yard!! The dog is crazy!! We have a decent sized back yard, I don't understand why he thinks he needs more room to run. We found him before he got too far, but that is why I need Vince to make sure the fence is good to go.
I went to the OB yesterday and my nurse practitioner was not in because she was delivering a baby so I saw another lady. She asked me if I was planning on going natural or wanting to be induced. I told her I really wanted to not be induced. My mom was induced with 3 out of her 4 children and she said the drug they gave her was REALLY hard on her body and it would probably have the same effect on me. So I had it set in my mind I would just wait for the little guy to make his appearance when he was good and ready. Well, she tells me that Dana, the woman who would be delivering me, will be leaving at the end of next week. She will be here on Wednesday, but be gone by Thursday. Oh great!! She also said, that at this particular office, they don't let a woman go past 41 weeks. For me that would be on the Thursday that Dana will be gone. My grandma was almost 3 weeks late with my mom and my mom was 2 weeks late with me so I'm pretty sure I'm going to be late with my baby. I really have no desire to get induced. So I will be going back in on Monday to see Dana and talk with her about my options. My mom suggested I ask if they could just break my water and try and get the process started without using any drugs. I'll see if Dana thinks that is a good idea. So if Logan isn't here by Monday, I will probably have to schedule a day to go in and get the little guy out. This wasn't my plan, but I guess things have a way of changing on their own.
If I don't have a chance to get on here again before he is born and you would like to come and see me and Logan *hint hint* :) I will be delivering him at Methodist. I will try to keep everyone updated on the situation though.
My kitchen sink still isn't up and running and since I have no bathtub, just a shower, I really need this to get done!! I have to have some way to give Logan a bath. I'm also begging Vince to make sure the fence in the back yard is solid from top to bottom because the dogs are going outside permanently once that is done. OMgosh they stink SO bad and it's not just me, my mom came over and said it really stinks like dog, yuck!! Pillow enjoys dragging herself along the rug in the living room and spreading her hair and mucus all over the rug and every morning when I come downstairs it smells worse than it did the day before. I stay up in the bedroom almost constantly because of this. Dumb dog!! I'm sure that family and friends will want to come and see the baby at our house and I don't want my home to reek. I need these dogs out so I can actually clean the rug so it no longer stinks. Oh yeah, and T-Bone has already managed to some how wiggle his way out of the back yard!! The dog is crazy!! We have a decent sized back yard, I don't understand why he thinks he needs more room to run. We found him before he got too far, but that is why I need Vince to make sure the fence is good to go.
I went to the OB yesterday and my nurse practitioner was not in because she was delivering a baby so I saw another lady. She asked me if I was planning on going natural or wanting to be induced. I told her I really wanted to not be induced. My mom was induced with 3 out of her 4 children and she said the drug they gave her was REALLY hard on her body and it would probably have the same effect on me. So I had it set in my mind I would just wait for the little guy to make his appearance when he was good and ready. Well, she tells me that Dana, the woman who would be delivering me, will be leaving at the end of next week. She will be here on Wednesday, but be gone by Thursday. Oh great!! She also said, that at this particular office, they don't let a woman go past 41 weeks. For me that would be on the Thursday that Dana will be gone. My grandma was almost 3 weeks late with my mom and my mom was 2 weeks late with me so I'm pretty sure I'm going to be late with my baby. I really have no desire to get induced. So I will be going back in on Monday to see Dana and talk with her about my options. My mom suggested I ask if they could just break my water and try and get the process started without using any drugs. I'll see if Dana thinks that is a good idea. So if Logan isn't here by Monday, I will probably have to schedule a day to go in and get the little guy out. This wasn't my plan, but I guess things have a way of changing on their own.
If I don't have a chance to get on here again before he is born and you would like to come and see me and Logan *hint hint* :) I will be delivering him at Methodist. I will try to keep everyone updated on the situation though.
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